expressome...

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

exactly what I've been afraid of...

This is exactly what I have been afraid of all along....hamesha....i stayed away from complications, particularly of this sort, for various reasons, this being the most significant. And here I am thinking…

…what if I see your face instead of his.
…what if I take your name instead of his.
…what if I want all the firsts with you not him.
…what if I…care for you…not him.


*how did it happen? why did it happen? I wnat my simple life back. I can NOT deal. I really can not deal with complications, with questions, with everything we have been through. I'm the first to turn around when I see things go haywire, or if it means something I set them in order, I never let them mean anything more than they should. I want out of every complicated situation, I was an expert at keeping them at an arm's length. Then how...how did it happen? why did it happen?*

posted by expressome at 12:46 AM

8 Comments:

  • hahah.
    koi scene nahee yar. just in a romantik mood and making do with poetry. girls involve far too much collateral and direct damage so just making do with words.
    =)
    busy busy. havent updated in a while.


    good to see you again!

    By Blogger Ent, at Wednesday, May 24, 2006 11:54:00 PM  

  • "…what if I see your face instead of his.
    …what if I take your name instead of his.
    …what if I want all the firsts with you not him.
    …what if I…care for you…not him."

    You smile and you pretend to not care because that is the only thing we can do. Us conflicted ones who cannot choose for ourselves and let life make the choices.
    Staying away from complications isn't the answer, sorting them out is. The more i read about these phantoms in yoru life the more i find myself feeling that you're letting this happen instead of making what you want to happen, happen.
    But sitting across the virtual world its easy for me to pass judgment and pin point the problem, give advise. For you to do what needs to be done may be much more difficult. But i will tell you this much, just like you have to open the closet door and peek inside in the middle the night to revoke the fear of the non existent ghost inside to be free of that fear for ever, you must take a white knuckled grip on your life in the wake of unforeseen circumstances and let fate know who's boss.
    Destiny, isn't written on our palms, its written by our choices. One draw back to this premise is that you can never find anyone but yourself to blame for whatever goes wrong. But the plus side is that chances are you never have to.
    My blog is testament to my inabilities to cope with 'love's labours lost', of my failure and the residual bitterness and anguish.
    You don't really want that do you?
    The merit of our conviction lies in beating the odds piled up against us. Maybe you should put the merit of your convictions to test.
    Maybe you should surrender and play the hapless lamb that got dragged to slaughter.
    The choice is yours.

    As for the Ijazat coincidence...
    What can i say besides maybe signs really do exist. If they do, we've had quite a few.
    Again, the choice, is yours.

    By Blogger Phitaymaun, at Thursday, May 25, 2006 1:13:00 PM  

  • there do com the complications,but wat matters is how u deal wid them or jus let them happen n over take u....wat ever is happenin jus analyse them n resolve them before it gets too late to take decisions.:)

    By Blogger S@n@, at Thursday, May 25, 2006 11:58:00 PM  

  • beknighted will reply in detail. have only one minute right now..and all ill say is....
    Im not "letting" it happen...WE both have decided NOT to let anything more than what we have happen...too many reasons...details soon..i owe u a very long reply

    By Blogger expressome, at Saturday, May 27, 2006 12:04:00 AM  

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